Relationship

Dear journal……….

Sometimes, I really don’t know the essence of making a relationship. Everything just seems to be more complicated than I thought. Just think about this…when you’re alone, I mean single, all you have to think in your mind is about your self and no one else to be concerned about. But when you with someone……you have to give an extra space in your mind to think about that person you’ve been with. It means, there’s an extra energy that you have to spend than when you’re single. Single could be an interpretation of independency or else, it could be a bunch of loneliness surrounds your days. What a contrary end in one bridge with two crossing ends. If you gave me a chance to choose what end I want my self to arrive at……..maybe you have to give me another bridge of life which is a bridge of relationship. That is to equalize life it self. Just like Yin and Yang in Chinese philosophy. You can’t live in a world just full of kindness…because the world itself life with a complete soul, when it has it badness either. It just how the unwritten law of life functioning. You don’t have it in your school lessons. You got it from life that you live in.

So……back to where ends I have to choose………let me stand on the first bridge…which is “the single bridge,” I’ve been there before, and to be exact I don’t choose where ends that I finally crossed. Because the truth is I stepped in to both of ends. And that happens when I also have tried “the relationship bridge.” Weird isn’t it? The same answer also happens for “the relationship bridge.” At one end, I feel really showered with happiness when I’m with the person that I loved, but then in some time……I felt like I just want to live my life in the circle of magnificent independency. That usually happens when I’m on a high priority of my ego. Just what I like…..and just like what I want. Selfish…………..
So…..life seems to be far away from simplicity. It always has two ends. Just live it and you will know……actually, “right now in what end I stepped my feet at?” It works with your heart sense.

Believe me……….

March 21, 2007
15.44 WIB